Let me hear your breath.

 

It’s been a while, where are you? I tried holding on to you, reaching you but you seemed to have forgotten me. I was scrolling my blog; reading the older posts and found that I wrote quite a lot about you.  I smiled; because of our cherished memories back then but it disappeared; you disappeared. Is this the end? Then, can I remove you picture from this blog? Will you be hurt? Will you notice it? Will you be sad like the last time I did remove your picture? Will you comeback if I delete it? Will you come back if I start forgetting you? Will you be reading this post? Do you still read my blog? Do you still remember my blog? Do you still remember me? Please answer me. Please let me at least hear your breath.

Please come and never go.

 Have you ever feel like there’s something in your heart; just looking for a way to come out? I don’t know what is this feeling; but it hurts; a lot. Maybe, just maybe, I was enjoying the present to much that I forgot, it won’t last forever. People said that loneliness hurts; but little did they know that what hurts is actually happiness. We were too happy that when it’s gone; it feels empty. Sometimes, we were too happy to realize someone is hurting.

Promise me you won’t leave me, promise me we’ll still like this forever, promise me to keep this promise; we often neglect the reality that we only hear what we want to hear. The further we go, the more hurtful it became.

Your drama has a long way to go before it’s over. So don’t force yourself to go quickly. If you go slowly, you can see a lot more, in more detail, than the people who go quickly. If you ask me who would grow more between those two, I’d say it’s the one who goes slowly and sees a lot.

Do you know what it means to become an adult? It means there’s less and less to smile about. So we’ll have to smile even more, even if we have to force it.

They say that there are two types of happiness. One is a happiness that you realize after the fact and the other is a happiness you feel in the moment. That happiness you feel in the moment is so precious that they say that the memories of this kind of happiness can stay with you and enlighten your life. Maybe we’ll go on remembering this moment today, like that kind of happiness… that we can remember for the rest of our lives, the moment when we shined.

I was holding on to my trembling heart.

I wonder what this feeling is; regretful? Over excited? Scared? To be honest, I never really understand my own feelings. But when I’m happy, I never faked it. But at the same time, when I’m happy, I stop thinking. It was like, everything just came out and I didn’t even realize what I was doing. When I got my brain straight, just then I realize; what was I doing? It’s shameful; to the point that sometimes I want to stop seeing people but no matter how hard I try, things never change. I wonder; is it me who doesn’t want to change or I never really learn from mistakes?

The reason my teen years are like a rushing wind is because I don’t yet know the answers; what it is I really want, who really loves me, who is it that I love. The time of life is when I tumble here and there, searching for the answers.

There are times when everyone wants to die. Even if you wanted to die, the fact that you endured it was great.

Don’t compete with your past but rather expect great things from your future and love your present self.


-REPLY 1997 END-

Yes, I’ll listen, although it’ll be all lies

Lies.

 It sometimes bothers me. It just happened and without realizing, we're lying. It was like, when we’re trying to end a conversation, but then we’re still on a conversation with another person. Being the one who got ignored, yeah it was hurtful but then come to think about it, who hasn’t done it? I mean, we don’t really mean to end that it; maybe we really got to leave but then some other thing got us hang around.

There are truths in the world that are better not known. Sometimes, to lie is better so that they won’t hurt.

Most people prefer to disregard the truth as the truth is more uncomfortable than the lie.

Yes, the truth is uncomfortable. But if we don't embrace that discomfort, then we must live the rest of our lives believing what's fake to be real. So even uncomfortable truths must be embraced. What you see is not everything.

- I HEAR YOUR VOICE END - 

All the best people are insane.

Friendship sometimes requires understanding, loyalty, jealousy and wasting time.

Annyeong~! It’s been quite a while since my last update. I was ‘busy’ lately. Mianhae bloggy-ah. So here they are, the Kelings! I haven’t write about them yet even we’ve been close for quite a while. They are awesome people who I met during my two semesters here in UiTM Puncak Alam.

 

Nadia Syamin bt Samsudin.

She’s the closest one to me. I don’t really know what to write about her but I know that she’s the crazy. We have a lot of in common actually; we often slept in class, we came late to class and we eat a lot HAHA. Thank you for making my life here more cheerful, thank you for still being here for me, thank you for being such a great friend even I often make you mad >.< You've taught me a lot especially on appreciating and understanding people better. And most importantly, thank you for being my life savior here. Sorry for all those mistakes and I hope our ties can never be broken.

 

Anis Syafiqa bt Rosman.
 

Well, I don’t really remember how we know each other but out of sudden, we became great friend. Thou I remember how hard you try to show how handsome celip is to us during sem 1 HAHA yes you can take him. For my beloved friend, I’ll back off so you can have celip. Thank you for the awesome things you’ve done even I could be really annoying; thank you for not hating me and never forget me!

Azila bt Mostafa.

Jijiel~! The most sporting person I have ever met. Thank you for cheering us all. I never really like taking pictures but since I met you, well, you know what’s happening now HAHA. She’s the first person to force me on taking picture with her; when I was having an eye illness  =_= .  Thank you for being a teacher to us and thank you for giving such a wonderful memory ^^

Syed Muhammad Aiman bin Syed Mohd Hakhiri.

The fanboy who approached me first; calling me Infinite HAHA. I never thought we’d be this close. Thank you for listening to my kpop stories and being the only one who understand me (about kpop) here. It’s awesome to have someone who we can be crazy over kpop with. You're a great friend, so never let others bring you down, arasso? And you’re the most insane Keling ever!  HAHA thank you for cheering our days. 그냥, 너무 너무 감사합니다~

Adam bin Mohd Bakri.

Adae. I don’t really know you much but still, thank you. Sorry for hijacking your phone a lot and I know your password~ HAHA. It was fun being able to know you and go crazy with all the Kelings. Sorry for making you chase me; it was quite embarrassing actually. All in all, just a simple thank you for every memories.