I was holding on to my trembling heart.

I wonder what this feeling is; regretful? Over excited? Scared? To be honest, I never really understand my own feelings. But when I’m happy, I never faked it. But at the same time, when I’m happy, I stop thinking. It was like, everything just came out and I didn’t even realize what I was doing. When I got my brain straight, just then I realize; what was I doing? It’s shameful; to the point that sometimes I want to stop seeing people but no matter how hard I try, things never change. I wonder; is it me who doesn’t want to change or I never really learn from mistakes?

The reason my teen years are like a rushing wind is because I don’t yet know the answers; what it is I really want, who really loves me, who is it that I love. The time of life is when I tumble here and there, searching for the answers.

There are times when everyone wants to die. Even if you wanted to die, the fact that you endured it was great.

Don’t compete with your past but rather expect great things from your future and love your present self.


-REPLY 1997 END-